To be honest, I had this week’s post planned. I had just recently learned about July being mental health awareness month and had to jump on the bandwagon. I planned to write about the strides we have made, making mental health a normal conversation. How depression among other mental health struggles was now not a reserve for the ‘ crazy’ in the society. How the mental health stigma has reduced in recent times. But I changed my mind.

Just recently I turned twenty, and to be honest ,I’ve been less scared. See, as a teenager I think I knew the drill. A lot of things I did were excused with an eye roll and an exaggerated sigh, ”teenagers, right?” I could get angry outbursts, be as irresponsible as I wanted but somehow my age made all these excusable. Maybe at first turning thirteen is confusing but a few years down the line, you actually realize how fun it is. You basically look like an adult, can pass for an adult but when times call for it, you could drift back to being a kid.

Maybe it’s all those ‘adulting’ skits I watch on YouTube (and laugh too much at the exaggerated suffering that adults supposedly go through) but somehow turning twenty and basically being stamped as a fully functioning adult is a bit scary. And I don’t think I’m scared about things like paying taxes or finding a nice job but maybe I feel like being an adult is a seal that you are pretty much alone now. You still have support from family but not as much as you did as your naive ten year old self. You just can’t call your parents in the middle of the night to help you make a decision. Remember how as kids we just wished for the freedom adults had? Well maybe some of us (read me😂) were not prepared for everything that came with being grown. It makes me wonder if I’m supposed to act a bit more mature now. Probably stop making all those out of context jokes I make that mostly are funny only to me. Maybe invest in suits now because I’ve outgrown jeans and t-shirts. Maybe even start a fully fledged business because apparently that’s what every twenty year old on instagram did.

But maybe I’m overreacting a bit. However, this is a milestone I hit and I’m surprised I haven’t had an existential crisis yet.

Pains of the pandemic

The country is going through yet another lockdown……

People who have left the country have to go through a 14 day quarantine….

With new Covid infections being at…..

The death toll has risen to…..

The curfew officially starts at …..

Just last year even I admitted these were new vocabularies. Right now though I’m pretty sure these particular words have been used more than freedom and happy if you get my gist. When Corona became a world pandemic, I, alongside a lot of people optimistically hoped it was a yearly thing. We said 2020 in disgusted tones, couldn’t wait for the cursed year to be over. When 2021 came, our hopes were up waiting for the disease to magically disappear but I think me and a lot of people forget that years are just a human evolution and days move the same despite the year change. Just a few months in, Corona had lashed out his claws again, infection cases rising, lockdowns happening again.

I remember last year writing a post on how I viewed the pandemic, ending it in penultimate motivational vibes of….go easy on everything. But now when I look back, maybe that message doesn’t really suit everyone. If you look at it, a person who has lost every means of income can obviously not just go easy. A person who is using the last of his/her income to treat themselves or their loved ones of the disease will not go easy. Telling them that is almost like rubbing salt on an already festering wound. It hurts enough already.

Such pains always come with their own mental health issues. In the past one year, statistics have shown a sudden spike in the number of people who are in mental distress. Depression, anxiety, bipolar disorders are on the rise. And if I am to be honest, my own mental health has been pretty tough on me as well. I cannot count the number of times I’ve had random anxiety attacks, worrying about the already blurry future that from this end has gotten uncertain.

This has led to a new pandemic, cases of domestic murders have increased. Every day on every news channel there are new reports of domestic arguments gone deadly. And even in some bizarre cases, peaceful loving families that have in the spur of the moment murdered each other. As in the monotonous words of experts, this is due to the mental health issues that have been on the rise. People have been pushed too much to the corner they are finally breaking.

This wasn’t a doomsday post, here to remind you of how tough everything has become. Neither was this a motivational post of go easy or we’re in this together. This is just a call for hope. Of better days to come. I’ve heard of a wiser person who said…..hope is never lost.

Also yesterday was earth day…so Happy Earth day!!